Recharging

Sometimes I get lost…

I’m talking about in life…though it does happen in my car too! I’ll be going somewhere new and I’ll have this feeling, like I’ve missed my exit…it’s a nervous feeling, but I know I will find my way, if only I could alleviate the flummox I feel. Is this a word flummox? I hope so because it really has a sound for how I feel- I feel flummoxed!

It’s different in my life though. I can visualize where I want to be, but I have absolutely no road map as to how to get there- and so it’s like I’m in this constant state of low-grade flummox.

When it comes to driving, I feel confident when asking for directions- on occasion I have been mislead but eventually I find someone who absolutely knows the terrain and assuredly sends me on my way.

Again- In my life it’s different. It’s different because everyone seems to have their own beliefs as to how life should be lived and in my heart…I know my path is as unique as me, and though I don’t know the way, I have these gut instincts as to when I’m on my path and when I’m off.
Sometimes I have to take detours- for it seems like there are blocks in my path. In my heart, I have to believe that there are reasons for these detours, special lessons of the heart to be learned…and so I try my very best to go with the flow. I don’t always succeed. I’m starting to understand, that sometimes, when you loose your way, it’s good to stop for lunch. Recharge your proverbial battery and just rest…until the next leg of the journey becomes apparent or inspired.

Occasionally I have to go down roads I’ve never been before. I feel scared- Fear of the unknown. But if I want to reach my destination, my dream…into uncharted territory I may have to go. Sometimes the universe guides me. Other times it feels like I’m on my own. I wish it were simpler. I wish that I had a clear idea of exactly how to get to where I want to go- but I don’t.

I’m learning that my dreams are bigger than I once dreamt, but bigger in a good way. For example, most importantly, I want to lead an uber-creative life doing what I love and making a great living from it. I’m partway there! That’s exciting. Unfortunately sometimes I focus upon that fact that I’m not 100% there and then I beat myself up. Argh. But then I have a whole internal conversation with myself- which usually happens best whilst writing…where I remind myself of how far I’ve come and encourage myself- Good work Shar!

I think impatience is one of my challenges. Sometimes I do think I need mild tranquilizers…to help me chill…my chillaxative!
Oh well… here I sit, experiencing one of my little rest stops…looking forward to feeling re-energized and moving forward, on to my next adventure. Thanks for hangin with me.
…xo …Sharron