Letting Go...

Letting Go…

I just had a strange little experience, which evoked some deeper compassion within me- and I realized the purpose of my tougher moments were, in fact , to help me build this compassion.

   I was in McDonald's picking up my Mocha latte with half syrup, skim milk and no whip- yup McDonald's is my new Starbucks- and there was a woman in the line-up ahead of me.  She was angry, not yelling angry, more of a spewing how terrible-the-world-is kinda angry.  It took me a moment to realize she was talking to herself.  I had zero judgment and felt sadness as I overheard bits of her diatribe with her self. 

    She was talking about how things were so much better way back when, and how the service was bad, and how her meal was bad, and the bag she was given was breaking…and so forth.  As I was leaving, I sent her a mental hug,  

and thought to myself, I've had days like that, the only difference being I have a mental filter that helps me understand which thoughts to keep to myself and which to share.  But the deeper issue I recognized was how much we hang on to a set of beliefs we've been taught- right from the get go- of how life is supposed to be and how people are supposed to be and how WE are supposed to be…and that as we hang on to these beliefs we make close friends with our discontent and it’s even hard to let this go sometimes.

    My next deep thought was, why is it so hard to let go?  Simply let go, of our expectations, of our beliefs that seem to create unhappiness, of people, unpleasant experiences and more.  Why do we feel this need to rehash our negative experiences, and play them back in our minds, ad-nauseum.  (sorry unsure of spelling here and spell check is not helping on this one J  ) 

   I’m certain there is some sort of neurological feedback-loop explanation as well as the belief that if we talk about or think about something enough, we can make sense of it and it will go away, however, my experience is that until we view any difficult situation with a somewhat positive slant, it will not go away.  Until we look with different eyes, we cannot see differently.

     Now here’s where my logical brain comes in and shows me the illogical-ness of it all.

We want to be HAPPY and yet we continue to hang on to thoughts and people and beliefs that make us unhappy.  WHY?  

 

   Here’s what I’ve come up with. We have become attached.  And sometimes we are more attached to our beliefs than our desire to be happy.  I see this everywhere.  We become more attached to being right than being happy.  We are more attached to our egos than our happiness and yet, the only way to happiness is by simply let go.

    Why do we find is it so hard- to let go? 

 As I think about letting go, I get this slightly nervous feeling in my stomach- like I feel when a jet takes off from the ground.  I’m about to fly in the air in a huge, heavy steel vehicle and yet, I trust that I will be OK. But the momentary groundless feeling is uncomfortable, and so can letting-go feel - momentarily groundless.

    Going from the known to the unknown takes courage and an adventurous spirit and in my opinion, this is the strongest type of self love.   Letting go involves trusting ourselves knowing that we have the strength to move forward, without having the familiarity and comfort of the past and yes, even negative situations have given us comfort.   

  If we adopt new beliefs, we may lose people who have supported us in keeping their belief system alive.  We may even lose ourselves for a moment, but I know, that the minute I let go of feeling righteous, or a discontent, or a person who is not honouring me, I feel happy, lighter, more joyful.  The more time I spend on my own, the more I get to know my strength, and creativity and then I realize all my relationships become stronger because I am stronger.  I play and stay with friends not out of fear of rejection or abandonment, but because they are fun to play with.  I can come and go, I don’t hold on as tight and allow them to come and go and be HUMAN.

  

So, you see, as we loosen our grip on everything, we come to know that WE are grounded in ourselves.

   And so, as my journey becomes more based upon how I want to feel, and less upon the details of how my life SHOULD be going, I come to appreciate and enjoy the beauty in each day.  I let go of expectations and become excited as to what each day might bring.  And even the toughest days become my greatest teachers.

   Letting go involves really committing to happiness. 

 It means reaching beyond what others might think or believe but allowing them to be where they are.   Letting go involves an awareness of how tightly we’ve been holding on.  Feeling the tightness in our bodies, but yet it’s as easy as breathing.   You breath in…and breath out- letting go of the toxic gases.  Breath in…breath out.

   Here’s to the adventures of each day.  Keep breathing...in, and… letting go.

Life is grander than we know.  Let’s choose beliefs that support our happiness.                                                   Xxoo  Sharron. 

ps All of the illustrations (except the top) are from a children's book I wrote and illustrated called ZORG and BORG's wonderful Adventure...but never published.  (o:  It's on a list, somewhere  lol)